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Well I’m fed up waiting for Olga to join me for a drink… 

January 13th, 2018

She’s probably washing her hair. I’ll take the opportunity instead to pour myself a large one and let you lovely people know what’s going on in the world of the Badger.

Festivities are over for another year – normally at this time I’d be letting you know the gossip on which customers are no longer welcome for their yuletide misbehaving, which members of staff have been romantically or biologically entwined etc etc. Alas no, everyone’s been impeccably behaved as far as I’m aware. Makes this blog a little duller than it otherwise might have been. That is of course unless I’m allowed to bring Warren from BeBaBo into the fold. Or Harry & Abi. Or that wedding we had upstairs. Hang on, my lawyer is on the phone. Erm, nope – I can confirm that definitely nothing at all of interest happened in the entire month. News just in – the Badger consortium is expanding. Our lovely owners HRH group up until last week had five independent businesses. Three oldy-worldy ones in York, a spectacular Village Inn in Kirkby Fleetham (middle of nowhere – Google it) and my splendid abode, The Fat Badger & White Hart. Somebody must be doing something right, because the portfolio has now become six. The papers have just been signed to confirm we are now the proud owners of another magnificent property bang in the heart of Harrogate. Now I could keep you guessing till the end of my rambling, run some sort of competition even so you can try to guess where it is. Let’s leave the quizzes to Clarkey on a Sunday though – we are now excited to announce The Yorkshire Hotel is ours. Yep, the big fella by the Cenotaph, prime location in Harrogate bar none, amazing views from the top floors, downstairs never seems to be as busy as maybe it should. That one. There’ll be all sorts of announcements in the near future about what we’re exactly doing with it – watch this space!! (Am I allowed to mention the zipwire Trina?)

This might be my last instalment before the date that every male in the country dreads. Valentines day. That’s right ladies, however good an impression that your other half gives that it’s a date they look forward to, a date where they can show their true feelings, a date to rekindle the passion from earlier in the relationship, sadly it’s not. It’s a date that we just hope to survive with a minimum spend, a correct selection of gifts / flowers / choccies, and picking the right place for dinner. See what I did there? Luckily there’s only two types of females – ones that like eating & drinking in the Badger, and ones that absolutely love it. Trust me, Mrs Badger only just manages to conceal her unbridled joy when I confirm what we’ll be doing for yet another year. One day she might even be able to take the excitement of Chef’s special Valentine’s menu in the Grill rather than Bangers & Mash and a couple of pints in the pub. She’s a lucky girl. Might even let her cook me a steak a month later on that special day I always forget the name of…


Past done, present done, let’s do a bit of future with some Mr Badger predictions for 2018:

Hopefully all the members of staff will survive w/c 22nd January. It starts with the annual Badger team Christmas jolly-up to York (sadly in this trade these things can’t happen in December – bit busy). If you’ve not been invited on this legendary tour of the drinking holes of the ancient city culminating in a feast at The Lamb & Lion, it’s because you don’t work here silly. But fear not, I’ve put Jason in charge of selfies and we’ll plaster them all over the Facebook page so it almost feels as though you’re there. Until he smashes his phone again obviously.
The same week sees five of the team head off for an educational and cultural tour to Prague. Well it was meant to be five of the team. Kieran’s since gone up in the world and so is officially a member of The Ivy team, and Matt doesn’t have the basic ability to update his passport or successfully purchase airplane tickets. I’m sure he’ll still enjoy his trip if the nice Customs people don’t pay too much attention to the very large suitcase that the others will be wheeling into the airport.


What else can Mystic Badger foresee for the year?

Every single building on Cold Bath Road will be either a hairdresser’s or eating / drinking establishment by December – and nobody will bother venturing into any other part of Harrogate.

There will be a national shortage of Slingsby rhubarb gin after February 22nd. Whatever amount of it isn’t actually consumed at our Gin event on the night will be stockpiled by the few remaining humans who haven’t yet realised it’s the world’s greatest drink ever.

Welcome to Yorkshire will announce that Harrogate has been chosen as the venue for the 2024 Olympics and the 2026 World Cup.

Colin Shute will actually pay for a round of drinks.

Well I think that’s me done for now – got a couple of barrels to tap in the cellar and a small leak to attend to in room 110.
Bye for now lovely people. Oh, and if you spot the tiniest spelling mistake or grammatical error on here, don’t bother getting in touch, Dan at the Coach & Horses will already have messaged me within 30 seconds of this being posted.

Till next time…

Mr Badger x